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Monday, January 2, 2012

When The Moon Hits Your Eye ...


Squigg:  "There she is folks.  Isn't she beeutiful."  Sigh. "Her eyes the color of a summer sky.  Each little whisker perfection."

Dweezil sticking claw down throat making gagging noises.

"Everyday I try to visit her.  I could spend hours just gazing at her loveliness."

More gagging noises.

"At least once a week I try to drop off a little present.."

Dweezil interrupting:  "Ah yes, a nosegay of deceased rodents, just the thoughtful gift every young lady wants to receive."  Hmm," tapping claws against cheek.  " Doesn't each nasty little corpse have a special meaning? Oh yes, I have it now., it's ratties for remembrance.  Or more likely in her case, mousies for misgivings might be more apropos. He thought for a minute and then finished with, "See a hare? Do beware."

Squigg laying ears back and looking annoyed.

Clippity clop, "Hi cats, it's me Jolie. Guess what I learned how to do?  Wanna guess, wanna guess?"

Dweezil: "Ignore it and it might go away."

"I can crisscross my front feet while turning, here I go." Jolie says pivoting around. "Well cats wasn't that the coolest thing ever."

Squigg:  "It's time somebody taught you some manners, missy. "It's Mr cats."

Dweezil:  "Why to I have to keep correcting everybody? It's Sir Dweezil and Mr. Squiggman.  I would think by now we would all understand these very clear social distinctions."

Sqigg: "Why do you get to be Sir Dweezil.  Aren't you the one who was born in a barn, while I was born in the lap of luxury, the adored only son of ...

Dweezil: "A woman of the streets and god only knows who."

Sqigg laying ears flat back and switching tail. "Don't you insult my mother.."

Jolie contemplating things:  "I know what a woman is and I know what a street is.  What to you get if you put the woman on the street."

Dweezil rolling, beating paws on the ground, holding stomach and laughing his head off, "snort, cackle, this is too good. If you put a woman on the street what you get is.."

Smack, swat,  smack, smack smack.

Jolie, jumping up and down :  Oh a fight, fight, fight.

Maia:  That's it! Stop this fighting immediately.

Jolie:  What would you be, if you went out on the street Maia?  I don't think it's possible for you to be Squigg's mother.Would you turn into another lady cat?"

Maia: "Enough. Jolie, stop this ridiculous line of conversation this minute. Sqigg, Dweezil, shake paws and stop fighting right now.  What is it with you two?  Why is it whenever I let you post something it always turns into this?  First we had perverted boy coyotes and hairdos down there.  Now we have nosegays of dead rodents and street walkers. I am mortified. Mortified, I tell you.  Sigh, what am I doing wrong.

The animals heads down start slinking away, except for Squigg who turns his head and whispers, "Sir Squiggman here. I think we all realize which one of us brought up nosegays of dead rodents and street walkers.  The lowlife who was born in a barn."

1 comment:

  1. Very funny - I love thinking of the conversations my dogs must be having too. GSD are so expressive with their ears - there is almost no need to speak the same language...