Dweezil cleared his throat and began, "And so my little friend, when spring has filled the air with sunshine and the birds are chirping and the flowers beginning to bud, the mommie cat comes outside"
"And heads straight for that zen spa spot where she's been digging her pee pee holes," Sqig interjected interupting Dweezil.
"And just why would she want to that?" Dweezil asked, not really wanting to know the answer.
"Because doesn't that spot underneath the willow tree by the rippling brook sound just like the perfect place for a litle romance?" Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.
Dweezil sighed deeply, rolled his eyes and ignoring Squig completely continued, "Yes, the mommie cat comes outside and sings her longing song for love. And when the daddy cat hears her,"
"He comes sneaking and creeping through the underbrush," Squig interruped again and then jumped off the chair to show everyone what sneaking and creaping looked like. " And once he's got her in his sights, he pounces," Squig pounced back up on the chair. "Bites her on the neck and sticks his."
"SQUIGMAN," Dweezil roared, knocking Squig off the chair in mid bumb and grind, "You will stop this pornagraphic pantomime this minute." He put his paws over his eyes and took a few minutes to compose himself, and then turning to Squig hissed, "What is this infusion of filth? Why must you drag the sewer into this discussion?"
"But Dweeze," Squig answered looking up, "Isn't that what happens. You said you wanted us to be edgy and fun, so I just thought."
"There will be no more thinking, Squigman. You have obviously been out in the sun too long or eaten a bad mouse. Your brain, what little there is of it, is not working properly."
"There are ways and there way to talk about this and we are going to take the high road, the one filled with beauty and romance. So get back up here and apologize and we are going to start over."
"Squig hopped back up and muttered, " I'm sorry." But he really wasn't.
TO BE CONTINUED