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Sunday, March 24, 2013

Perplexed Part 2

Dweezil cleared his throat and then turned the camera back on.

"I'm sorry folk, Squigman had to use the litter box, didn't you Squigman?"

Squig nodded yes, while giving Dweezil the stink eye.

"Now where was I?  Ah yes, we are now moving to the indoor pee pee holes that are conveniently available in several rooms through out the house.  And here is what's important about them:  First you may only use the cat sized pee pee holes that are located in the same room as the human's.  No matter where else in the house you may find one, you are only allowed to use the pee pee holes that are close to where the humans do their human business.  And the second important point, is that you can only pee pee in the hole." He instructed, extending and pointing his claw for emphasis.  You must never, and I mean never poo poo in the pee pee hole."

"I did that once and it was a nightmare" Squig said softly a haunted look coming over his face."

"Squigman," Dweezil hissed, "This is not the venue for airing dirty laundry."

"I couldn't cover it up and when I tried to shove it down the hole it got all over my paws.."

"Squigman, enough!  Nobody is interested in hearing all the disgusting details of your personal faux pas"

"I tried to cover it with Maia's scrubby thing and it got all over it,"Squig continued compelled by some inner demon to relive his personal disaster.

"Squigman," Dweezil shrieked,  all we need to say is there is no poo pooing in the peepee hole.  Do I make myself clear!"

"I can see it just like it was yesterday," Squig continued wringing his paws.

"What is going on here?" I demanded coming into my office. 

"Maia," the cats squeaked jumping off my office chair.

"You know, when I read that post about perverted boy coyotes and hairdo's down there, I thought I was swimming in a cess pit of stupidity.  But this latest effort, makes that look like a philosophy symposium held at Harvard."

"Maia, I can explain," Dweezil answered scrambling around for justification.

"I just bet you can," I replied, while inwardly cackling and thinking to myself, STRIKE ONE.  This blog is well on it's way to being mine again.

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