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Saturday, November 30, 2013

Cleanliness is Next To..Don't Ask

"Squigman, get in here right now." Dweezil commanded from the newly remodeled jack and jill bathroom.  "Do you see this," he said pointing to the brand new self sifting cat box. "And do you see this," he continued pointing to the baseball bat in the corner.  "If you do not use this, cat box correctly," he instructed, "I will be forced to smack you around with that bat.

Squig was lounging against his bathroom door looking bored.  Obviously more instruction was called for.

"Allright," Dweezil said snarkily, "I will pretend I am you and show you how this box works.

He shoved Squig out of the way and reentered the room looking bored and out of it.  Scratching his butt and then under his arm he shuffled over to the box.  Plopping himself down on the seat he said, "Here I am doing my morning cat business and now that I'm done what was it that Dweezil said to do, hmm.:

A. Pull the lever and sift my nasty waste away.

B. Leave it in a stinking pile for Dweezil to find.

C. Forget that this box is self sifting and wreck it trying to cover things up.

Gee this is really a hard question.  Let me think.  What would Dweezil do.  Hmm, if I leave it in a stinking pile for Dweezil to find or wreck the box, Dweezil's going to hit my head with that bat. That might hurt, so I'd better push the lever.  Now all I have to do is clean myself up and I can leave.  Do you understand or should I make it simpler for you." he finished hopping off the box.

Squig stood there in sullen silence.

"OK, Squigman since I'm not getting a lot of response here, why don't you show me how it's done so that I know that you get it."

Squig smiled cheerfully as a wonderfully Dweezily idea came to him. Scooting into Dweezil's new room, he opened the door with a great deal of flourish and theatrics.  Flouncing over to the box, he sat down and moments later said with a smile as he waved his paws about, "Oh looky look what I have made.  Whatever should I do with it.  Sift it away or gild it and create something wonderful.  Oh I know, I should collect it, gild it, stick a feather in it and paste it on a hat. Aren't I the cleaverest kitty in the litter.  Oooh did I say litter, naughty, naughty me."

And with that Dweezil pounced and began choking Squig while Squig got in a few good swipes. Their battle was interrupted by the shriek of a police whistle and Yvette, poking her head in the bathroom, said, "Since you boys have so much energy, you can come downstairs and help me make room for the Christmas tree.

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